A Shepherd Who Nudges

The Lord is my shepherd. I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul. 

He leads me in the paths of righteousness for His name's sake. 

Yea, Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil, for you are with me. Your rod and your staff they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. 

You anoint my head with oil. My cup runs over. Surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life and I will dwell in the house of The Lord forever. 

:Psalm 23:

This chapter is such a profound reminder of truth for me right now. A reminder of how my Lord cares for me, directs my wanderings, protects me from harm and fills my life with peace. 

I'm tempted to freak out a little when a crossroads presents itself, and I'm faced with a decision to choose one path over another. (And I'm assuming I'm not alone?) What I really always want is for The Lord to visit me in a dream and very profoundly in His deep and Godly voice say "Kayla, my daughter, this one right here is the correct path." Wouldn't it be great if things were that easy? And sometimes they are that easy- sometimes He does bless us with really clear direction. But I'm learning that sometimes He let's us make decisions too. 

This is where things get hard because I don't trust myself to make decisions. I'm too emotionally driven or attached to my current comfort or just not wise enough to figure things out on my own. When God has done the figuring out for me in the past, things have been so easy! It's not hard for me to trust Him when He's walking in front of me and I can clearly see where He's headed. But when it's up to me?? I usually opt for not making a decision and instead sit still in the middle of the road. (I'm not advising this, people)

But as our shepherd, I'm learning that sometimes He walks behind us, too, and gently nudges us one way or another. He lets us know subtly that we're going the right way or re-directs us if we're heading somewhere that may be harmful or dangerous or just not what's good for us. 

Ben and I are in a spot right now where this is all too real to us. We know there's a decision to be made but don't see our shepherd in front waving His hand any certain way to let us know where too go. He's behind us this time and is whispering "go where you want to, guys. I'll be with you either way."

If I'm being honest, I'm uncomfortable with this. I don't think I've practiced "following The Lord" in this way before. 

But what I'm reminded of when I read these verses and what my prayers keep repeating is that I know I can have full confidence that my shepherd is with me, He comforts me and He will lead me to still waters. When I don't have faith in myself, I do have faith in Him. No, I'm probably not going to make the best decision, but yes, He will always be real close by either way, helping me and guiding me as I go.